Right, I'm 19 and my girlfriend is 18, we have been going out for almost 2 years now. We become friends while me and my previous girlfriend were breaking up (it was quite a bad situation so having this girl in my life at the time really did help me). We started off as friends and we slowly turned into best friends, we were always together! From the beginning, we both found each other attractive and when me and my ex broke up we started hugging more and more and slowly turned into kissing. After a few months of fun and flirting we took it that step further and had sex. At this point we both had strong feelings for each other but technically, we were still "single". We were doing everything a couple would do, except no-one had really asked anyone out. 5/6 months later, I then thought it was time I asked her out, and with no surprise she said yes.

Fast forward to now, there seems to be so much problems in a relationship with a girl I truly do love with all of my heart -

Trust: She doesn't trust me one bit. I work in clubs and bars so she sees the possibility of me cheating very high. Also (not to boast) a lot of girls do find me attractive and she knows this and doesn't like it. I do have a past, I have cheated twice on my ex girlfriend but I would never cheat on this girl. Although, I know this is a perfectly good reason for her to have insecurities but I can't help but ask, why did she go out with me if she didn't trust me? When I ask her, she says "there's more to it than trust", but I believe trust is a key thing in a relationship.

Arguments: We go through phases of having many and big arguments, sometime over little things. What normally happens, is something will happen to piss one of us off and we'll say and show its pissed us off, which will lead to a small argument, then one of us will bring up something bigger that we've argued about before which will then lead into a massive row. My girlfriend has huge anger problems, any little thing will tick her off which will result in her taking it out on me and result into an argument. I feel like I am walking on eggshells sometimes, I have to constantly think if what I say or do will annoy her.

Intimacy: When we first started having sex, even before we were going out, it was every day, sometimes 3 times a day.. We couldn't get enough! Our kisses used to feel so passionate and we used to have so much lust for each other. Nowadays she never wants anything, not just sex, even kissing. We have spoken about it and she has said she just prefers hugs and she has made a slight improvement in kissing. But it seems to me that after I tell her how I'm feeling about the kisses, for that day she will kiss me loads and then the next day it'll go to hardly anything again. Even when she does kiss me, its messing around, joking around, not passionate like I've asked. I want the passion back in this relationship, I want the lust. As a result of her not showing much intimacy towards me, it leads to me feeling unattractive and unhappy.

Appreciation: I think that over the 2ish years we've been going out, that my girlfriend has become used to me and used to the things I do for her. Its a big effort for her to just say "thank you" to me when I've done something e.g. pick her up from college, drop her off to work. Also, she never seems to see the things I do for her, ONLY the bad things. I shower her with love and gifts and I tell her 24/7 how much I love her and how attractive she is, yet she never sees any of this.

As we stand now we are on a "break", she says she doesn't want to go out with yet because she wants to be sure, so right now I am sitting on the fence waiting for something to happen, which isn't fair. Although we are on a break, she still wants everything to be the same and everything is the same. We still see each other nearly every day, we still (on the rare occasion) kiss and have sex, we still hug, hold hands in public, we still tell people we are going out, so nothing is really different. And because nothing seems different, I feel like this is never really going to change, we will always be on this fence. We have spoken about this and she says she wants to be sure and she likes the fact that I'm "wanting her" in a way.

I feel like I just want to either go out or not go out. To be in a relationship or to be friends. Despite of all these problems, we get on very well, but it feels more like a friendship more than anything right now. I REALLY don't want to break up with her, I just want to sort things out and go back out with her, but I know if we do at least we can remain good friends.

Sorry to go on so much, I just really need to let everything out and get some advice on the situation. End of the day, I want my girlfriend BUT I want it to feel like a relationship, I want intimacy, I want lust.. Not just a friendship.

Thanks for listening and for any advice!

x